Meet the Team
The Canine Cabinet
(& One Supreme Ruler)
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Head of security
Cupid
"Coop Doop"
Cupid has been promoted from Security Guard after many dedicated years of rigorous training- mainly consisting of barking at squirrels, delivering intense stares at passing pedestrians, and constantly ensuring the mailman is in not, in fact, a covert threat. His dedication to keeping us safe is unwavering, though sometimes his methods involve more enthusiasm than necessary. After a long shift of diligently patrolling the office, he ensures the team is well rested with his signature "lap inspection." If he's not handling a security threat, he's often found snuggling on the job. He's got your back- and your lap.
Director of HR
Sylvester
"Meowlone"
Sylvester is, without a doubt, the office's "people person". We're still not sure what he actually does, but we do know he demands our attention. Often. Loudly. Whether you are on an important work call or quietly typing an email, you can always expect him to voice his thoughts- consider it his form of performance feedback. If ignored, he'll escalate to louder meows, followed by more aggressive purring. After all, he's just making sure you're staying productive.
Eventually, you'll be convinced that the office revolves around him. And it does.
Office assisant
Rubble
"Rub Dub"
Our newest hire, Rubble, has proven to be an asset to the team. Rubble's resume includes an impressive background in "Being a Goober" and "Looking Adorable While Getting in the Way." Though still new to the job, he's eager to climb the ladder- quite literally- if it involves napping on top of it. You may find him under our main desk, where he keeps an eye on office operations- just in case anything exciting happens (or someone drops a snack.) His enthusiasm for the company is unmatched, especially if there are treats leftover from our reservations.
The Distinguished Doggo Division
Chief Operations Officer
Lila
"Sleeping Beauty"
Meet Lila, our steadfast COO and resident expert in operational efficiency through strategic inactivity. A glorious blend of couch potato and seasoned executive, Lila was born in a sunbeam and has spent every day since trying to return to one. While she occasionally dabbles in security oversight, she quickly recalls that delegation is key. With eight consecutive years as our “Most Likely to Pretend to Be Asleep When Called” honoree, Lila leads by example - reminding us that a well-rested team is a productive one.
Senior Strategy Advisor
Nova
"Flopzilla"
Nova serves as our strategy advisor, guiding long-term vision with a quiet intensity and a strong commitment to upside-down thinking—literally. Composed entirely of majesty and mystery, she prefers to lead through nonverbal communication: lingering stares, contemplative sighs, and the occasional slow blink. Barking is far too conventional for her strategic style. Often found belly-up in deep thought, Nova reminds the team to approach every challenge with poise, perspective, and just a touch of dramatic flair.
Jr. business associate
River "Wigglebutt"
Technically a puppy, but emotionally a caffeinated tornado, River constantly keeps us on our toes. Born with one purpose: to chase balls until the Earth runs out of them. As you read this, she’s probably waiting by the door with a soggy tennis ball and crazy eyes, ready to launch the next big initiative with full energy and unwavering focus. Her boundless enthusiasm and relentless drive make her an invaluable asset to the team’s growth and momentum.